(Source: some-things-dont-change, via bobswagget)
(Source: quentinjacobsen, via classydegrassi)
Gripping the handles of the paper bag in her hand, Clare’s eyes scanned over the long hallway as her flats echoed along the linoleum floors. The noise sounded ear-piercingly louder with every step she took closer to Room 208. Every door along the way was closed completely and though a couple…
Eli turned slowly on his side. The silence of his room pierced his ears. He felt uncomfortable here. Not only in this room or the bed that was not his own but in his skin. He didn’t feel right at all as his mind drifted a million miles away. Silent tears fell from his eyes now as he reflected on the last few days. It all went back to that one night that sent him over the edge. What was meant to be a simple walk to clear his mind turned out into a bitter fight with her. He didn’t even expect to happen across anyone, least of all her. But as his unfortunate luck would have it, she came right into his path that night. Eli tried to push the memory from his mind but to no avail.
As he closed his eyes now, he could recall the anger in hers that night. She was furious and Eli knew she had eevry right to be. The regret was heavy in her voice as she wish she could undo it all. Her words destroyed him. Eli merely tried to apologize and make amends but still she remained relentless. He knew he deserved it. He knew he was to blame for all the upsets she faced. But hearing it come directly from her did something to Eli’s mindset. Broken, he apologized one last time and left from her. Once inside his house Eli knew he needed to clear his mind from the plaguing thoughts. He filled his bathtub and took a few pills. That’s all he could remember. Somehow he was in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors. The whole space in between was a blur.
Eli sighed heavily and stretched onto his back. He clenched his jaw and pinched the bridge of his nose. Eli’s head began to hurt. He sighed again and sat upright. She was on her way to see him. Eli was a bit skeptical. He wanted to see her, without a doubt but Eli feared what she would think of him now. He felt like a disappointment to her. Even if she said he wasn’t Eli couldn’t shake the nagging thoughts that lingered. Would she think any less of him? Would she hate him even more? Would this add more hurt and pain to her life? Eli didn’t have answers to any of these questions. He hoped to have them resolved. His door was open and he could hear light footsteps approach. Eli’s heart raced as he saw her in the doorway. He smiled tenatively. “Hey there,” he ventured. “I’m really glad to see you.”
The voice was coarse but still familiar. Clare’s head turned and within the sheets of the bed, she found the boy she had been looking for. She thought once she was confronted with the moment, her heart would stop racing. Her head would stop spinning. Her hands would stop sweating. She thought maybe it was just nerves, nerves that she tended to get before big tests or before essays were passed back. But as she locked eyes with him, she knew it wasn’t just nerves. She was anxious. She was scared. She felt guilty. And all these negative emotions swallowed her whole as she finally took sight of him completely.
He looked fragile, as if the bed was keeping him together; one step on the ground and he’d break. The bags under his eyes were massive and dark and though he’d been unconscious for a while, he looked as if he’d been awake for days. The gaze in his eye looked just like everyone else’s - dead. His hair was messy, greasy, all over the place. He even looked paler than normal. All Clare wanted to do was nurture him back to complete health, to the days they’d spend in Miss Dawes’s classroom bickering over a hook. She tried not to show the hurt in her eyes, the hurt for being the cause of him like this. With a force smile, she took slow steps forward, shrugging slightly under the pressures the room brought on.
“Hey,” She bit out, finally coming to his bedside. She wasn’t sure how to respond to the rest of his statement. Why was he glad to see her? Last time she saw him, she had just thrown all her worries and problems on him, blamed him for it all and pushed him over the edge. If she were in his place, she wouldn’t want to see him at all. She’d hate him. She hated herself. Looking down, though, she didn’t want him to notice the conflicting emotion she was feeling. Lifting the bag in her hands sheepishly, she let out a forced chuckle, “I, uh. I brought some food. Just something little, since the food here probably isn’t the greatest. And a comic for entertainment purposes. I don’t know how long you’ll be here, but…” She could tell she was rambling, as she did when she was feeling stressed. Quickly closing her mouth, her eyes slowly moved to his, wondering if he caught onto that. And when she noticed he was still looking at her as well, she was captivated. His green eyes still held that entrancing quality. She couldn’t look away, no matter how much she wanted to just run.
One look at her was all it took. She was still as beautiful as she always was in his eyes. He studied her face. He could see hesitation in her movements. Her eyes seemed a bit distant but still radiated and pulled him in. Everything about her was just as he remembered, slightly altered however by her uncertainty. He knew his appearance was a lot to take in. Eli felt guilty for putting her through this ordeal. She shouldn’t have had to worry about him. He didn’t want to force his troubles onto her but Eli knew he was selfish. He wanted to see her at whatever cost. He was nervous what she thought was she looked back at him. Her mouth seemed tense, a telltale sign she was feeling anxious. Eli wished there was something he could do to ease her mind.
The room was silent. The whole floor in fact was like a ghost town. The only sounds to be heard were the light beeping sounds the monitors made. Eli’s eyes scanned her face once more as she stepped further into the room. His heart skipped a beat, per usual any time she was close to him. Eli bit down on his lower lip. He wanted to touch his fingertips to her cheek. He wanted to trace the contours of her face and tell her that he’d be okay. He knew it was a far fetched request. Even having her here now was a lot to take in. He figured she would keep her distance from him. The last time they spoke was such a train wreck, he wouldn’t have blamed her. But here she was now and Eli couldn’t be happier to see her. He was unsure of what to say. She seemed a bit lost for words for a moment as well.
Soon her soft voice filled the space. It was a melody he would never grow tired of. She spoke quickly, her words coming out so fast Eli had to focus intently on what she was saying. He knew her rambling was brought on by nerves. He couldn’t blame her at all. The whole situation left him hanging in the balance as well. “Thanks, Clare. I really appreciate.” Something similar to a smile fell faintly on his lips but soon faded. Eli swallowed a lump that rose in his throat. He bit his tongue as he thought up something to say. “I’m sorry…for everything. And before you say I don’t have to apologize, please just hear me out,” he said quickly. “The whole thing with Alli…that was brought on mostly because I just needed someone there. Adam has been MIA and I have no one else to turn to. At the end of the day…it always goes back to you. I lo-…care deeply about you. I know that doesn’t change anything and that you don’t like me let alone love me anymore but I am glad to see you tonight. The circumstances aren’t the best, obviously, but seeing you again…it means a lot.”
If Clare wasn’t feeling so lonely and down on herself, she would have seen the parallel. If she had been in the same mind set of wanting to back to her old self, like Alli had pushed that night, Clare would have seen not only the boy in the bed tonight, but also the boy who had been in a previous hospital bed after crashing his hearse. But really, as her eyes looked to Eli’s, she didn’t feel the need to escape from him completely. He was just like her, in a sense. Isolated, secluded. Sure, he needed a little more attention; he was on the brink and needed a way to cope. But in end, they both came back to one adjective and both of them had the power to escape it.
Clare felt like she had no control anymore, though. Now that she was set within this room, with a boy who she loved so dearly, broken up, she felt like she had lost all control of her actions. It was like her main goal had suddenly become to keep a smile on Eli’s face, no matter what the cost; a complete 180 from the first time she had seen him tied down to a bed that wasn’t his own. Placing a hand on the edge of his bed, those eyes engulfed her. Dead as could be, they still reminded her of all the goods times underneath the stars, in his bedroom, just in the hallway at school. Matched with that perfect smirk and tousled hair, how could she resist? And when Eli’s smile showed a hint of normality from before this entire mess had blown up, Clare couldn’t help herself. Her other hand reached out and brushed a few loose strands of dark hair from those emerald green eyes.
It was a slight touch, the smallest movement, but it was the first time the two of them had any sort of physical contact. And all Clare could think now was that she needed him. But she needed the old him. And to get that, he needed to get better. The pills would have helped in moderation. The therapy, had he still attended it, would have also been beneficial. And she needed to make that clear. Tearing her eyes away, she lifted the bag and placed it gently in his lap before moving away from the bedside as she spoke, “I never hated you, Elijah.” She was feeling vulnerable as these words fell, unable to look him in the eye, but they did need to come out. “You’ll always keep a special place in my heart, so of course I still care for you. That’s why I’m here.” She paused as she sat down in a chair across from his bed. Her eyes were still on her hands though, focused on the pale yellow nail polish that was chipping away. “But you still need to focus on getting better. No matter what that entails, with me by your side or not.” Another pause extended itself between them before she glanced up to look at his frail body again, “Okay?”
Eli was all too aware of how close she was to him. He could smell her floral scent. The aroma swirled around inside his head, making him feel light as air. No amount of space or time could ever erase the memory of her. No detail was too small for Eli to recount. He could sense her actions from a mile away. Eli was deeply in tune with her. How easy would it be for him to reach a frail hand out to her? Could he be bold enough to make such a move? Eli wanted to more than anything. He craved even the slightest bit of her. She was an addiction for him. A drug he could use over and over again and still never manage to become immune to; not that he would want to anyway. Eli needed her like he needed air to breathe. Everything about her made him feel renewed. Having her so close felt like old times even if the circumstances were so severe. He wished for some type of contact to put his mind at rest.
Eli stared into the clear blue eyes that lit his darkest days. He remembered seeing them now as he faded a bit that night. They were the last things he saw before his mind went blank. Eli was content with her face being the last thought he had. It’d be more than enough to carry over. Eli felt saddened. She was so close yet a million miles away. Surprisingly she brought their two worlds together, brushing his dark locks from out his face. Eli closed his eyes briefly at her action. His heart raced as her fingertips gently skimmed across his skin. He clenched his jaw, his need to be closer to her was overwheliming. Too quickly for his liking, it was over as she retracted her hand and turned her attention to the bag she brought. Eli opened his eyes, almost in a fog as the contact with her still lingered in his thoughts. He focused intently on the words she had to say, watching her movements to search for extra meaning.
He watched as she took a seat in a nearby chair, her word still fresh in his head. “I could never, ever hate you, Clare. You mean everything to me and I want to be okay, better for you…me…us,” he said softly. He didn’t dare look her in the eyes as he spoke. Instead he opted to toy with the fringe of his blanket. “I’ll always love you and want you…need you in fact.” He wasn’t sure if he should be uttering these words but they weighed far too hevaily on his mind for him to forgo trying. Eli bit down on his lower lip and sighed. “Even if we’re never together again…I just need to have you in my life somehow. Friendship, acquaintances…something is better than the nothing we’ve been since we broke up. I-it’s killing me, Clare.” Now Eli felt bold enough to look at her. She stopped playing with her fingers and met his gaze. Eli was unsure how to decipher her expression. Once more he side. “All I know is that I love you and I hope that we can save whatever is left between us. If it’s not salvageable, I think I can accept that. I just need to know if we have a fighting chance.”
Clare had no intention of leaving him with any false hope, but as the words fell from his lips, her eyes closed. It was nice to hear it from him, the one word that used to make her heart go soaring. And without the scenery of the bed and the room they were currently in, it was almost peaceful, like they had officially slipped back into their old ways. As the sound of the beeping IV faded and Eli’s voice still echoed in her ears, she focused on a past memory. Feeling the grass tickle the back of her neck, feeling the body heat of the boy beside her, she slipped back into a moment when they were star-gazing. She rested her head against his chest and the bass in his voice vibrated as he told her he loved her. She smiled a bit but as her eyes fluttered open, she was greeted with the same sight as before, Eli in that bed.
She looked away, feeling shameful. What if she was just holding pathetically onto her former days with Eli? What if the cynic in him had completely torn every part of him that she loved apart? There was always the chance that even if he got better, he wouldn’t be the same. There was always the chance that even if the medication and the doctors cured him of whatever disorder he had, he’d move in to place his lips against hers and their moment of happily ever after would be ruined when the sparks didn’t fly any longer. It could be hope that was shining a light on them, showing them that they maybe had a ‘fighting chance.’ But could she risk getting hurt again? She’d been through so many ups and downs these past months, it was really beginning to take a toll on her.
But as she looked to Eli, she realized that she needed him as much as he needed her right now. And though she had no intention of placing herself by his side with the title of ‘his,’ she still wanted to hold his hand through the bettering process if he could focus on the light at the end of the tunnel - not them together, but him as a mentally stable, improved person. “Eli, focus on yourself. Not me, or the idea of a future us.” The words even discouraged herself and she found herself compensating for them, running her hands over her thighs as she looked down again, “I mean, maybe. You’re right, we do have a fighting chance. But not until you get better for your own sake. And it’s not something that’ll happen over night or in a week. It’s going to take a while.” Her eyes lifted from the tiled floors to meet his again and she bit her lip momentarily, thinking over her following words. “But I’ll be here for you, by your side, if you stay on track.”
(via stalker-angel)
Gripping the handles of the paper bag in her hand, Clare’s eyes scanned over the long hallway as her flats echoed along the linoleum floors. The noise sounded ear-piercingly louder with every step she took closer to Room 208. Every door along the way was closed completely and though a couple…
Eli turned slowly on his side. The silence of his room pierced his ears. He felt uncomfortable here. Not only in this room or the bed that was not his own but in his skin. He didn’t feel right at all as his mind drifted a million miles away. Silent tears fell from his eyes now as he reflected on the last few days. It all went back to that one night that sent him over the edge. What was meant to be a simple walk to clear his mind turned out into a bitter fight with her. He didn’t even expect to happen across anyone, least of all her. But as his unfortunate luck would have it, she came right into his path that night. Eli tried to push the memory from his mind but to no avail.
As he closed his eyes now, he could recall the anger in hers that night. She was furious and Eli knew she had eevry right to be. The regret was heavy in her voice as she wish she could undo it all. Her words destroyed him. Eli merely tried to apologize and make amends but still she remained relentless. He knew he deserved it. He knew he was to blame for all the upsets she faced. But hearing it come directly from her did something to Eli’s mindset. Broken, he apologized one last time and left from her. Once inside his house Eli knew he needed to clear his mind from the plaguing thoughts. He filled his bathtub and took a few pills. That’s all he could remember. Somehow he was in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors. The whole space in between was a blur.
Eli sighed heavily and stretched onto his back. He clenched his jaw and pinched the bridge of his nose. Eli’s head began to hurt. He sighed again and sat upright. She was on her way to see him. Eli was a bit skeptical. He wanted to see her, without a doubt but Eli feared what she would think of him now. He felt like a disappointment to her. Even if she said he wasn’t Eli couldn’t shake the nagging thoughts that lingered. Would she think any less of him? Would she hate him even more? Would this add more hurt and pain to her life? Eli didn’t have answers to any of these questions. He hoped to have them resolved. His door was open and he could hear light footsteps approach. Eli’s heart raced as he saw her in the doorway. He smiled tenatively. “Hey there,” he ventured. “I’m really glad to see you.”
The voice was coarse but still familiar. Clare’s head turned and within the sheets of the bed, she found the boy she had been looking for. She thought once she was confronted with the moment, her heart would stop racing. Her head would stop spinning. Her hands would stop sweating. She thought maybe it was just nerves, nerves that she tended to get before big tests or before essays were passed back. But as she locked eyes with him, she knew it wasn’t just nerves. She was anxious. She was scared. She felt guilty. And all these negative emotions swallowed her whole as she finally took sight of him completely.
He looked fragile, as if the bed was keeping him together; one step on the ground and he’d break. The bags under his eyes were massive and dark and though he’d been unconscious for a while, he looked as if he’d been awake for days. The gaze in his eye looked just like everyone else’s - dead. His hair was messy, greasy, all over the place. He even looked paler than normal. All Clare wanted to do was nurture him back to complete health, to the days they’d spend in Miss Dawes’s classroom bickering over a hook. She tried not to show the hurt in her eyes, the hurt for being the cause of him like this. With a force smile, she took slow steps forward, shrugging slightly under the pressures the room brought on.
“Hey,” She bit out, finally coming to his bedside. She wasn’t sure how to respond to the rest of his statement. Why was he glad to see her? Last time she saw him, she had just thrown all her worries and problems on him, blamed him for it all and pushed him over the edge. If she were in his place, she wouldn’t want to see him at all. She’d hate him. She hated herself. Looking down, though, she didn’t want him to notice the conflicting emotion she was feeling. Lifting the bag in her hands sheepishly, she let out a forced chuckle, “I, uh. I brought some food. Just something little, since the food here probably isn’t the greatest. And a comic for entertainment purposes. I don’t know how long you’ll be here, but…” She could tell she was rambling, as she did when she was feeling stressed. Quickly closing her mouth, her eyes slowly moved to his, wondering if he caught onto that. And when she noticed he was still looking at her as well, she was captivated. His green eyes still held that entrancing quality. She couldn’t look away, no matter how much she wanted to just run.
One look at her was all it took. She was still as beautiful as she always was in his eyes. He studied her face. He could see hesitation in her movements. Her eyes seemed a bit distant but still radiated and pulled him in. Everything about her was just as he remembered, slightly altered however by her uncertainty. He knew his appearance was a lot to take in. Eli felt guilty for putting her through this ordeal. She shouldn’t have had to worry about him. He didn’t want to force his troubles onto her but Eli knew he was selfish. He wanted to see her at whatever cost. He was nervous what she thought was she looked back at him. Her mouth seemed tense, a telltale sign she was feeling anxious. Eli wished there was something he could do to ease her mind.
The room was silent. The whole floor in fact was like a ghost town. The only sounds to be heard were the light beeping sounds the monitors made. Eli’s eyes scanned her face once more as she stepped further into the room. His heart skipped a beat, per usual any time she was close to him. Eli bit down on his lower lip. He wanted to touch his fingertips to her cheek. He wanted to trace the contours of her face and tell her that he’d be okay. He knew it was a far fetched request. Even having her here now was a lot to take in. He figured she would keep her distance from him. The last time they spoke was such a train wreck, he wouldn’t have blamed her. But here she was now and Eli couldn’t be happier to see her. He was unsure of what to say. She seemed a bit lost for words for a moment as well.
Soon her soft voice filled the space. It was a melody he would never grow tired of. She spoke quickly, her words coming out so fast Eli had to focus intently on what she was saying. He knew her rambling was brought on by nerves. He couldn’t blame her at all. The whole situation left him hanging in the balance as well. “Thanks, Clare. I really appreciate.” Something similar to a smile fell faintly on his lips but soon faded. Eli swallowed a lump that rose in his throat. He bit his tongue as he thought up something to say. “I’m sorry…for everything. And before you say I don’t have to apologize, please just hear me out,” he said quickly. “The whole thing with Alli…that was brought on mostly because I just needed someone there. Adam has been MIA and I have no one else to turn to. At the end of the day…it always goes back to you. I lo-…care deeply about you. I know that doesn’t change anything and that you don’t like me let alone love me anymore but I am glad to see you tonight. The circumstances aren’t the best, obviously, but seeing you again…it means a lot.”
If Clare wasn’t feeling so lonely and down on herself, she would have seen the parallel. If she had been in the same mind set of wanting to back to her old self, like Alli had pushed that night, Clare would have seen not only the boy in the bed tonight, but also the boy who had been in a previous hospital bed after crashing his hearse. But really, as her eyes looked to Eli’s, she didn’t feel the need to escape from him completely. He was just like her, in a sense. Isolated, secluded. Sure, he needed a little more attention; he was on the brink and needed a way to cope. But in end, they both came back to one adjective and both of them had the power to escape it.
Clare felt like she had no control anymore, though. Now that she was set within this room, with a boy who she loved so dearly, broken up, she felt like she had lost all control of her actions. It was like her main goal had suddenly become to keep a smile on Eli’s face, no matter what the cost; a complete 180 from the first time she had seen him tied down to a bed that wasn’t his own. Placing a hand on the edge of his bed, those eyes engulfed her. Dead as could be, they still reminded her of all the goods times underneath the stars, in his bedroom, just in the hallway at school. Matched with that perfect smirk and tousled hair, how could she resist? And when Eli’s smile showed a hint of normality from before this entire mess had blown up, Clare couldn’t help herself. Her other hand reached out and brushed a few loose strands of dark hair from those emerald green eyes.
It was a slight touch, the smallest movement, but it was the first time the two of them had any sort of physical contact. And all Clare could think now was that she needed him. But she needed the old him. And to get that, he needed to get better. The pills would have helped in moderation. The therapy, had he still attended it, would have also been beneficial. And she needed to make that clear. Tearing her eyes away, she lifted the bag and placed it gently in his lap before moving away from the bedside as she spoke, “I never hated you, Elijah.” She was feeling vulnerable as these words fell, unable to look him in the eye, but they did need to come out. “You’ll always keep a special place in my heart, so of course I still care for you. That’s why I’m here.” She paused as she sat down in a chair across from his bed. Her eyes were still on her hands though, focused on the pale yellow nail polish that was chipping away. “But you still need to focus on getting better. No matter what that entails, with me by your side or not.” Another pause extended itself between them before she glanced up to look at his frail body again, “Okay?”
(via stalker-angel)
Gripping the handles of the paper bag in her hand, Clare’s eyes scanned over the long hallway as her flats echoed along the linoleum floors. The noise sounded ear-piercingly louder with every step she took closer to Room 208. Every door along the way was closed completely and though a couple…
Eli turned slowly on his side. The silence of his room pierced his ears. He felt uncomfortable here. Not only in this room or the bed that was not his own but in his skin. He didn’t feel right at all as his mind drifted a million miles away. Silent tears fell from his eyes now as he reflected on the last few days. It all went back to that one night that sent him over the edge. What was meant to be a simple walk to clear his mind turned out into a bitter fight with her. He didn’t even expect to happen across anyone, least of all her. But as his unfortunate luck would have it, she came right into his path that night. Eli tried to push the memory from his mind but to no avail.
As he closed his eyes now, he could recall the anger in hers that night. She was furious and Eli knew she had eevry right to be. The regret was heavy in her voice as she wish she could undo it all. Her words destroyed him. Eli merely tried to apologize and make amends but still she remained relentless. He knew he deserved it. He knew he was to blame for all the upsets she faced. But hearing it come directly from her did something to Eli’s mindset. Broken, he apologized one last time and left from her. Once inside his house Eli knew he needed to clear his mind from the plaguing thoughts. He filled his bathtub and took a few pills. That’s all he could remember. Somehow he was in a hospital bed, hooked up to monitors. The whole space in between was a blur.
Eli sighed heavily and stretched onto his back. He clenched his jaw and pinched the bridge of his nose. Eli’s head began to hurt. He sighed again and sat upright. She was on her way to see him. Eli was a bit skeptical. He wanted to see her, without a doubt but Eli feared what she would think of him now. He felt like a disappointment to her. Even if she said he wasn’t Eli couldn’t shake the nagging thoughts that lingered. Would she think any less of him? Would she hate him even more? Would this add more hurt and pain to her life? Eli didn’t have answers to any of these questions. He hoped to have them resolved. His door was open and he could hear light footsteps approach. Eli’s heart raced as he saw her in the doorway. He smiled tenatively. “Hey there,” he ventured. “I’m really glad to see you.”
The voice was coarse but still familiar. Clare’s head turned and within the sheets of the bed, she found the boy she had been looking for. She thought once she was confronted with the moment, her heart would stop racing. Her head would stop spinning. Her hands would stop sweating. She thought maybe it was just nerves, nerves that she tended to get before big tests or before essays were passed back. But as she locked eyes with him, she knew it wasn’t just nerves. She was anxious. She was scared. She felt guilty. And all these negative emotions swallowed her whole as she finally took sight of him completely.
He looked fragile, as if the bed was keeping him together; one step on the ground and he’d break. The bags under his eyes were massive and dark and though he’d been unconscious for a while, he looked as if he’d been awake for days. The gaze in his eye looked just like everyone else’s - dead. His hair was messy, greasy, all over the place. He even looked paler than normal. All Clare wanted to do was nurture him back to complete health, to the days they’d spend in Miss Dawes’s classroom bickering over a hook. She tried not to show the hurt in her eyes, the hurt for being the cause of him like this. With a force smile, she took slow steps forward, shrugging slightly under the pressures the room brought on.
“Hey,” She bit out, finally coming to his bedside. She wasn’t sure how to respond to the rest of his statement. Why was he glad to see her? Last time she saw him, she had just thrown all her worries and problems on him, blamed him for it all and pushed him over the edge. If she were in his place, she wouldn’t want to see him at all. She’d hate him. She hated herself. Looking down, though, she didn’t want him to notice the conflicting emotion she was feeling. Lifting the bag in her hands sheepishly, she let out a forced chuckle, “I, uh. I brought some food. Just something little, since the food here probably isn’t the greatest. And a comic for entertainment purposes. I don’t know how long you’ll be here, but…” She could tell she was rambling, as she did when she was feeling stressed. Quickly closing her mouth, her eyes slowly moved to his, wondering if he caught onto that. And when she noticed he was still looking at her as well, she was captivated. His green eyes still held that entrancing quality. She couldn’t look away, no matter how much she wanted to just run.
(via stalker-angel)
Gripping the handles of the paper bag in her hand, Clare’s eyes scanned over the long hallway as her flats echoed along the linoleum floors. The noise sounded ear-piercingly louder with every step she took closer to Room 208. Every door along the way was closed completely and though a couple people had walked down the hall in the opposite direction of her, they didn’t seem like they were hurting or were in any way ‘crazy.’ The people within Suicide Watch actually looked just like Clare; a dead gaze in their eyes as they went on with their lives. It made the girl a little sadder, if that were possible. If these people were on the streets, no one would know that they were on the brink of life and death. They’d be treated just like everyone else and that one extra push from a person on the subway or the roll of a stranger’s eyes could set their vulnerable side off.
Clare shook the thought from her head. She never imagined she’d be here. Visiting hours had no specific time, but the people on suicide watch were on a tight schedule and all lights were out at midnight, latest. Family and friends were allowed to stay the night and Clare wasn’t so sure how comfortable she was with the idea of that just yet. But it was 11 o’clock in Toronto and an hour seemed like too little of time to really clear any air between her and Eli. She tried not to linger on that issue at hand just yet, though, especially as her baby blues fell onto the sign, indicating that she had arrived at Room 208. The door was slightly ajar, but all she could see in the barely lit room were the tiles on the flower a few shadows of objects laying about.
For a moment, she stood there, hesitating to such an extreme, she was almost convinced that her body was going to turn around and flee without her mind agreeing. But when her hand moved up and pushed the door open, it let out a squeak and she knew there was no turning back. She took a step forward, swallowing the lump that had formed at the base of her throat and looked around the dimly lit room for the boy who needed her most.
You didn’t piss me off. You’re just annoyingly right. But thanks, good luck with whatever you may dealing with, too.
…You’re the most obnoxious anon I’ve ever had. I’ve only had a few, but you still take the cake. Congratulations.
